My New Insecurity

I’ve never been an insecure person so this feeling is verynew to me.  Growing up I was neither skinny nor heavy set, I pretty much maintained an average weight and height through out my childhood and teen years.  Even after having my first son I was at a size that I was really comfortable with.  It wasn’t until after having my third child that my body changed drastically.  I was putting on weight a lot easier and my metabolism went down.  Last week while shopping I grabbed some clothes in my size and took them into the dressing room and a couple of the jeans were tight.  I got really frustrated and ended up putting them back on the rack, and walked out of the store irritated with myself.  Since that day I’ve been feeling really self-conscious about my appearance, even to the point where I’m taking comments by others the wrong way and even started feeling guilty about what I eat.  

I’m sure many of you, like myself, have done the whole “I’m starting my diet on Monday” speech or even “I’m going to cut out carbs” only to find yourself giving up.  I’m tired of setting myself up for failure.  So I’m going to start documenting what I eat every day, sort of as a “food diary” on this blog here.  It’s something I’ve never tried before.  I’m not going to cut out the foods that I like, instead I’m going to start eating smaller portions.  I also plan to start taking walks on my days off and on my lunch breaks.  I’m not looking to lose a huge amount of weight; I’m looking more towards being healthier and feeling good about myself and hopefully shed about 15 lbs along the way.  Wish me luck!

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