3 days of feeling burned out!

I’m finally feeling better after 3 days of feeling Burned Out!  On Saturday I just felt so stressed beyond what I could handle.  I started to have an anxiety attack, a really bad one!  We’re talking about hyperventilating, crying, the feeling that my world was just crashing down.  The littlest things seemed so stressful to me.  It lingered for a couple of days, naturally, and finally started to subside this afternoon.  The thing is, when this happens it feels like a snowball of just things going wrong one after the other.  I feel so detached from everyone and everything.

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I’ve learned to deal with it and that the best thing to do is basically RELAX as much as I can.  For me, I need to stop myself from doing things like cooking, cleaning and running errands. Pretty much just putting my “to do” list on hold because it’s added stress that I can’t deal with when I’m feeling that way. So, on Saturday my 2 middle  kids stayed with my mom and Kahele put in double daddy duty with Aria. I went to bed really early.  On Sundays we BBQ at my in-laws house with the family.  Did I mention that crowded places with loud people are something that I really need to stay away from?  I can’t deal with it!  I feel like I’m sitting there and the noise and claustrophobia start a boil within me and at any moment I’m going to have a turrets moment and just flip out. Well, it was loud and too crowded for me and I started to feel anxious again.  Let’s just say it was another early night for me again.

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Now let’s move forward to yesterday…. The day that pretty much took the cake!  I wake up ready to take on the world and still feeling like crap.  My baby was sick so she was on a whining fit and any parent knows that feeling of helplessness when you’re driving and your baby is crying in their rear-facing car seat and you can’t do anything for them.  Take that feeling and multiply it! That’s how I felt.  So I get her home, feed her, give her a nice bath and put her down for a nap.  Alas! Here’s where I get to relax right? Um, no such luck. As I get comfy in my bed ready to bing on my weeks worth of reality shows that I’ve missed I turn on my television to discover that there’s something wrong with the cable! My WIFI is down, which is connected to my cable.  So I’m stuck with no T.V. or internet! I call the cable company and they say they’ll get to it and issue me a ticket. Ugh, at this point I’m not going to let it ruin my day.  So I walk downstairs to make me a snack, because what’s more relaxing than being lazy and stuffing your face right?  And… there’s a puddle of water on my kitchen floor coming from my bathroom upstairs.  I dart up the stairs and see that my toilet is leaking!  WTF right?!

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Again, I tell myself I’m not dealing with this bullshit and clean up the water and turn the valve off.  Now I can’t use my own toilet!  No biggy I have 2 others.  While in the bathroom I remembered that my towel rack needed to be fixed.  As I’m trying to put the damn thing together I pull the whole fucken (excuse my French I’m just at this point) bracket out of the fucken wall!  Aria (my baby) wakes up from the noise screaming her head off and suddenly I feel like my day off has gone to shit! I’m completely numb and go through the rest of my day on the verge of having a complete melt down.  I am basically a zombie just trying to do my motherly duties and looking forward to getting my kids to bed so that I can finally sleep myself. I woke up at about 3am this morning and had a good cry.  Oh man did I let it all out and told myself that today was going to be a great day.  The morning started off a bit gloomy but as it went on I started feeling a lot better.  I’m feeling pretty good right now.  Don’t you just hate when bad days happen 3 days in row?!  I need a mental health day for myself!

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Royal by Winter Renshaw

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Synopsis:

His name is Royal, but he’s no prince charming. He’s not even a prince-though you could say I loved him once upon a time. He was my older brother’s best friend. Growing up, he sat at our dinner table every Sunday, teased me mercilessly, and pretended I annoyed him. When I was old enough, he took me on my first date. Royal taught me how to drive. Escorted me to my junior prom. Gave me my first kiss . . . amongst other things. He was my first taste of toe-curling, all-consuming, can’t-sleep love. We had our whole lives ahead of us. There was never anyone else for me but him. And then he disappeared. No letter. No explanation. Not even a good-bye. I’ve spent the last seven years trying in vain to forget my first love, but just when I think I’ve finally moved on, guess who’s back in town?

My Thoughts:

I really enjoyed this book!  It reminded me a lot of the Poughkeepie series, which I was obsessed with. I usually don’t like when the author switches POVs but in this book it worked well. If I had to complain about one thing is that there was this big secret why Royal went missing for 7 years and he didn’t want to tell Demi until the time was right and when he thought she could handle it.  They made it seem like it was something sooooo unbelievably tragic (don’t get me wrong it was awful) but when there was this big reveal I was expecting so much more.  Other than that it was a pretty good book.  I’m definitely going to read the second book.

Cozy Nook Inspiration

Sometimes I find myself walking into a restaurant, bar, department store or even hotel room and find myself in awe with the decor.  So much that I actually want to take some of the ideas and incorporate them in my own home.  This morning I was in a cafe and I sat in this little nook waiting for my order to be ready.  Isn’t it the cutest?  Well, now I have that itch to mimic this area.

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Sugarfina Waikiki

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Why do these candy stores keep popping up all over the place?!  Don’t they know that sweet shops are my weakness?!  Last week the new International Market Place opened up in Waikiki.  For those of you who have been to Waikiki in the past you may remember the market place… well it’s nothing like it was before.  But we’ll just save that for another post.  Let’s just say that it’s not the same “bargain with the vendor” shopping like it used to be.  Now it’s expensive shops everywhere!  Among those expensive stores, that I probably won’t ever walk into, is this cutest candy shop called Sugarfina.  I saw one in San Francisco but never went in.

It’s so pretty and inviting that I couldn’t help myself and had to check it out.  It is pretty pricey, but your treats come in the cutest packaging and everything looks so beautiful. There’s such a wide variety of “boutique” style candies, I had to pick up a couple of things for the kids (and myself of course).  The saleswoman told me that what was unique about their shop is that they get their candy imported from all over the world.  I also love that this candy store seems to cater to grown-ups with their Champagne Gummy Bear, Peach Bellini Gummies, Pale Ale Pint Gummies and their Maple Bourbon Caramels just to name a few.

The 4 photos below are from sugarfina.com

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They also customize their labels for special events like weddings, showers and birthdays. So if you got the cash to spend this may be something perfect for your next party.

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No Bake Mochi Cheesecake

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Ingredients:

The crust:

2 1/2 cups Graham cracker crumbs (about 2 1/2 packs)

1/2 cup of melted margarine (8 tbsp or 1 stick)

The Cheesecake:

16 oz strawberry cream cheese softened

2/3 cups sugar

2 cups sour cream

4 tsp. vanilla extract

16 oz cool whip

The mochi:

chi chi dango

Now come on!  You all know I bought some ready packaged chi chi dango.  However, there are some great simple recipes for homemade mochi out there.

What to do:

The crust:

Mix melted butter and graham cracker crumbs together and pack into 9×13 inch dish

The Cheesecake:

Beat the cream cheese until smooth with an electric mixer. Gradually beat in the sugar. Beat in the sour cream and vanilla until just combined. Fold in the whipped topping. Scrape mixture onto crust. Chill in the refrigerator for 4 hours.

Assemble:

Cut your cheesecake into rectangles, try not to go ever 2 1/2 inch pieces (the mochi will be too thin).

Take your mochi rectangle and roll it out to a size that will lay nicely over your cake (like pictured).

**Note: you will need some potato starch to prevent the mochi from sticking to roller pin.  You can also use some regular flour.

Garnish with some cool whip and strawberry slices (optional)

The Dinner Party by Brenda Janowitz

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Synopsis:

This Passover Seder is not just any Passover Seder. Yes, there will be a quick service and then a festive meal afterwards, but this night is different from all other nights. This will be the night the Golds of Greenwich meet the Rothschilds of New York City.

The Rothschilds are the stuff of legends. They control banks, own vineyards in Napa, diamond mines in Africa, and even an organic farm somewhere in the Midwest that produces the most popular Romaine lettuce consumed in this country. And now, Sylvia Gold’s daughter is dating one of them.

When Sylvia finds out that her youngest of three is going to bring her new boyfriend to the Seder, she’s giddy. When she finds out that his parents are coming, too, she darn near faints. Making a good impression is all she thinks about. Well, almost. She still has to consider her other daughter, Sarah, who’ll be coming with her less than appropriate beau and his overly dramatic Italian mother. But the drama won’t stop there. Because despite the food and the wine, despite the new linen and the fresh flowers, the holidays are about family. Long forgotten memories come to the surface. Old grievances play out. And Sylvia Gold has to learn how to let her family go.

My Thoughts:

Great book!  As a parent I can relate to Sylvia in the sense that you have such great expectations for your children that you want to push them towards success, sometimes disregarding the fact that maybe they yearn for something different.  And I also could relate to Sarah because growing up I always wanted to please my parents even if it meant keeping secrets that I know would disappoint me.  I sometimes felt like I wasn’t doing a lot of the things that I wanted to be doing in fear that they’d judge me.  This book is so true to life when it comes to tight knit families.  I recommend this awesome read.